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Old Time Bad, Episode four, Season three, The Weight of Love,
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self worth and the Journey to sobriety.
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Welcome to season three, Episode four of Absolutely Focused Radio,
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your space for raw truth, reflection and empowerment. I'm your host,
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Daniel Nelson, aka your sobriety Buddy. Today we're diving deep.
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We'll talk about the painful realities of feeling unsupported, unheard,
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and disrespected in relationships. Will break down the complex emotion
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of guilt, how it can either hold us back or
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help us move forward. And most importantly, we'll get into
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the journey to sobriety, the reasons people start drinking, the
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struggles they face when trying to stop, and how at
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the heart of it all there's often just the need
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to feel heard and understood. Joining me today is Jane Marie,
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who will help us navigate the stats and insights. Together
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will uncover the power of reclaiming your worth and finding
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strength in your voice. Let's get into it.
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The weight of love and the reality of feeling unheard.
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Life has a way of testing us in ways we
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never expect. Imagine. Being in a relationship, whether romantic, familial,
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or professional, where you give your all, offering love, support,
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and presence, yet feel unseen and unappreciated. For example, you
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might find yourself constantly showing up for someone, only to
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realize the effort is one sided, leaving you feeling isolated
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and unheard. Or perhaps you're navigating a situation where expectations
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weigh heavily on you, even when there's no one explicitly
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placing them there. No matter the type of relationship or circumstance,
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at the core, we're all human and we all need
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to feel heard and valued. For so many, drinking becomes
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a response to that silence. It's not about complaining, it's
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about expressing a pain that no one else is willing
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to listen to. People drink for different reasons, to have fun,
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to escape, or to mass the feeling of being unheard
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or unsupported. But what people fail to understand is that
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for many, drinking isn't the root problem. It's a symptom
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of something deeper.
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Spotlight on strength.
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Before we go further, I want to introduce Jane Marie. Jane,
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welcome back to the show. Can you share some insights
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on the reasons people turn to drinking and the challenges
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of choosing sobriety.
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Thank you, Daniel it's great to be here. You're absolutely right.
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Drinking often starts because of an unmet need. Research shows
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that twenty five percent of people who drink heavily do
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so as a way to cope with stress, including relationship
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challenges or work pressures. Fifty percent of those with drinking
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problems report using alcohol to self medicate feelings of anxiety, loneliness,
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or depression. A significant portion of people in abusive or
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toxic relationships turn to drinking because it feels like the
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only escape when they aren't being heard or supported. But
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when someone chooses sobriety, they're not just giving up drinking.
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They're committing to facing everything they tried to run from.
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It's a journey of transformation, but it's.
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Not easy understanding the challenges of sobriety.
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Choosing sobriety means confronting the reasons you started drinking in
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the first place. For many, it's about breaking generational cycles,
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addressing trauma, or simply finding their voice. Let's break down
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some of the key.
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Challenges feeling isolated in relationships.
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Imagine being in a relationship where the connection feels one sided,
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where your presence is met with indifference and your words
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are met with resistance. It's like standing in a room
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with someone yet feeling utterly alone. Sobriety forces a hard,
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unflinching look at these dynamics. It demands clarity, pushing you
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to confront the truth about what's healthy, what's draining, and
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what needs to change to reclaim your peace and strength.
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Running away from pain.
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For some, drinking can feel like the easiest escape, a
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way to number stress, bury the pain of loss, or
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dodge the crushing weight of expectations. But relying on alcohol
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can lead to further damage, both emotionally and physically. Studies
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show that nearly twenty percent of people who drink to
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cope with stress develop more severe mental health issues, such
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as anxiety or depression. Choosing sobriety means stepping into the discomfort,
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confronting those emotions head on, and discovering healthier, more empowering
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ways to heal and move.
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Forward, breaking free from toxic cycles.
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It's common to be in relationships where your feelings are dismissed.
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You're not complaining, you're trying to be heard, but when
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no one listens, it's easy to turn to alcohol as
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the one thing that doesn't argue back sobriety shines a
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light on these toxic patterns.
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The need for fun and connection.
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For some, drinking starts as a way to have fun
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and connect with others, but when it becomes a crutch,
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sobriety means learning how to enjoy life and build connections
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without alcohol.
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Daniel, those are also true, and the statistics back it up.
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People in toxic or unsupportive relationships are thirty percent more
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likely to develop drinking problems. Seventy percent of those who
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start their sobriety journey say the hardest part isn't giving
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up alcohol, it's addressing the emotional wounds they tried to hide.
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And here's a hopeful stat sobriety improves relationship satisfaction for
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sixty five percent of individuals who commit to personal growth
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and honest communication.
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That's powerful, Jane. It shows that sobriety isn't just about
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stopping a habit, It's about rebuilding yourself and your life.
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Guilt barrier or catalyst.
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And that's where guilt often comes in. When you choose sobriety,
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guilt can either hold you back or push you forward.
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Let's revisit the two types of guilt. Constructive guilt a
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guide that helps you grow and make amends. Destructive guilt
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a weight that keeps you stuck in the past.
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And what's so important is recognizing that guilt often stems
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from feeling unheard. People blame themselves for their pain or
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the reactions of others, but that's not fair. It's okay
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to feel guilty, but it's what you do with that
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guilt that matters.
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Personal reflection.
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I've been there feeling like no one wanted to listen.
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But let me remind you of something you deserve to
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be heard. It's not complaining, it's asking for what every
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human deserves, understanding, love, and support. If you're struggling in
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a relationship, at work, or with your own self worth,
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you're not alone. Sobriety is a journey, but it's also
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a statement that you refuse to let the silence or
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pain define you. I know how hard it is to
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show up every day when the person closest to you
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tears you down. But it's not your job to carry
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the weight of someone else's bitterness. You deserve to be loved, respected,
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and value for who you are.
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Take away affirmation.
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Your worth is not determined by someone else's failure to
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recognize it. You are enough exactly as you are. You
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hold the power to create a life that mirrors the
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love and respect you truly deserve. Thank you for joining
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me and Jane Marie for this powerful conversation about sobriety,
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guilt worth, and the reasons we turn to alcohol. To
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everyone listening, remember this, it's not about complaining, it's about
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being heard, and you deserve to be heard. This is
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Daniel Nelson, your sobriety buddy. Stay amazing, stay blessed, and
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never forget to smile on purpose because you are the purpose.
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Until next time, be well and take care.
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And we're life.
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This is a journey and we're stand at all to jiggle.
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We rise, but conquer it all with every step, the
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returning through the fire, heap besperce